Top Parenting Help: Be Consistent
Consistency is fundamental to successfully teaching a son or daughter right from wrong when correcting them. It keeps minor misdeeds and poor behaviors from turning into bigger misdeeds. You need to stand steadfast and really mean it when you instruct, “Turn off the television now”or ”no computer game time because you did not tidy up your room”.
Consistency demonstrates to your son or daughter there are clear repercussions for misdeeds and inappropriate or unsatisfactory deeds or demeanour.
Displaying a lack of consistency when correcting effectively means you are liable for for your children’s misdeeds and will not demonstrate to them how to be liable for their actions.
It’s also necessary that each partner is consistent with the disciplinary code. If one parent is stern and the other is too laid back, the son or daughter will key into that and attempt to engineer the position to his or her advantage. Parents must be of the same mind on disciplinary code in advance and make a vow to each other to be consistent in implementing and following through with the consequences. This can be particularly hard if the child’s parents are divorced or separated. Even though you are not anymore, it’s essential that both parents have a united footing. Openly and sincerely discuss these boundaries with your former spouse and your son or daughter beforehand, so that if disciplinary action is needed, the repercussions of such bad behavior are well grasped in advance.
Any division between parents should bediscussed when the child is not present.
Remember, being consistent is all about being strong, even when doing so is really hard or arduous. It can sometimes be disheartening to return home after a demanding day at work only to find a challenging night of parenting in front of you.
Your son or daughter will regularly test the limits and ‘push the envelope’ with you to see if there’s any room for maneuver in those consequences. By being strong you are establishing there is not and that you trust them to do nothing less than assume ownership for their actions.
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Posted on: Wednesday, March 19, 2008 at 8:56 am 
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